“An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.”

LADY ASTOR : Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.
WINSTON CHURCHILL : Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it.


I guess that would be diplomacy at its utmost best.
A man strong enough to rule a country of alcoholics willing to drink poison if a certain member of his parliament offered it to him...not to forget,IN A DRINK!!!

THEN WHO IN HEAVENS GRACE WAS I??

I was all of 17 years old and a true sailor...a man who would drink a bottle to prove his manhood n swagger back home with an arm full of women(PROVE HIS MANHOOD...HUH???)
OR SO I THOUGHT!!!

BUT A FOOL AND HIS THOUGHTS SOON PART AND THE FOOL MUST DEPART!!!
WHATEVER!!!!!!

I had just moved from Delhi to Mumbai...oops Bombay...and was training with a bunch of cut throat wannabe pirates waiting for their oppurtunity to rule the seas!!!

SID THE BRAINDEAD
OZZY THE WOOZY
MANDEEP THE SERPENT
JAI THE SNAKE CHARMER
ALEX THE EASY
SANDEEP THE PIMP
ANAND THE INVINCIBLE


The list is endless but i chose to cease there as this was the group involved in this particular episode!!!
There can be only one king in a jungle and one jungle which is truly a jungle...we had our groups and rivalries...
Brazil vs Argentina Finale...if you may!!!
Delhi vs Bombay and an evenly matched set of teams with its defences up and ready for that one oppurtunity to show their offence!!!
One such argument...resulting in a wager!!!
Manhood to be proven...
A BOTTLE OF OLD MONK IN THIRTY MINUTES AND NO ADDITIVES ALLOWED!!!!!!

The winner takes it all...the loser standing small!!

In all the clucks a cough can be mistaken as a growl and thats just what happened!!!!
The crowd backed out...bets started being laid...murmurs rose to uproars...n here was i in the absolute midst of it without a clue of the trouble i had coughed myself into!!!

A cough ( pronunciation (help·info) Latin: tussis) is a sudden and often repetitively occurring reflex which helps to clear the large breathing passages from secretions, irritants, foreign particles and microbes. The cough reflex consists of three phases: an inhalation, a forced exhalation against a closed glottis, and a violent release of air from the lungs following opening of the glottis, usually accompanied by a distinctive sound.[1] Coughing can happen voluntarily as well as INVOLUNTARILY.

Frequent coughing usually indicates the presence of a disease


Did anyone not figure the involuntarily part?????

But it was too late now!!!
THE DELHI BOYS STOOD TALL WHILST THE BOMBAIYAS(MIGHT AS WELL HAVE BEEN PAPAYAS) HUDDLED UP AMIDST THEIR MURMURS!!!
ARGENTINA HAD A PENALTY KICK...

Four quarters of OLD MONK in front of me.
I had been fooled already!!!
My never have drunk before self didnt realise that a bottle is 750 ml whilst a guarter 250 ml...i had been fooled into drinking 33% extra...viva bombay!!
MARKETTING STRATEGY...BUY 3 GET ONE FREE!!!

YO HO HO AND A BOTTLE OF RUM

A TREASURE TO BE FOUND ON TREASURE ISLAND!!!!

First cask opened...three seconds in my mouth and into my blood stream!!!!
My first taste of poison!!!
THIS WAS EASY...LIKE DRINKING WATER!!!

Three more and i was onto holiness guided by the wise old monk himself!!!
Second cask...it went down like a hot knife in soft butter!!!

the huddling happened...murmurs happened...the wagers happened...n THE OLD MONK HAPPENED!!!!
:(

#3 happened...n the involuntary coughing again...n i was feeling the saintliness already!!!

guided through travines tottering n falling i picked up the last n opened n put it on my mouth n that was it!!!!!!!!!
more came out than what went in and it would not think of stopping!!!!
the first time i threw up on the wise old monk!!!

i was put under the shower in the common bathroom n i was wishing all my frenz n well wishers a happy holi!!
200 rupees to turn back 7 months!!!
wow!!!!

I was put to bed and got to know exactly how dizzy the spinning earth might feel!!!!
TWO WHOLE DAYS THE WORLD SPUN AROUND FOR ME!!!!

i was living the life of a top...spinning my way to the loo n back!!!
THE PIMP told the authorities but that is another story...

For now I was the king :)
the daring idiot who had finished a bottle and a lil more n still lost the wager!!!

IDIOCRACIES OF THE WAVERING MIND
HA HA!!!!